How to Make a Hoe Into a Wife
It’s an old cliché you’ve most likely heard at one point in your life. “You can’t turn a hoe into a housewife”. Why do they say that and where does it come from? Is this even true?
What is a hoe?
For this piece, let’s say that a hoe is a slut. She is sexually free and has a healthy sexual appetite. Maybe, she is typically non-discriminatory about who she sleeps with or she does not take a long time to forge anything more than a superficial connection with someone before she leaps into a sexual relationship. In more explicit terms, a hoe is simply a good time lady. Sometimes, a woman is perceived to be a hoe simply because she has a basic need and desire for sex albeit even if it’s not excessive.
What is a wife?
Traditionally, a wife is a woman who is married to a man and serves as a nurturer and a caretaker to her family. Of course, the role of a wife can vary depending on the man and the household so I am using a general description of what the average man seems to think a wife is. The quintessential essence of a wife serves her husband and child(ren). Many men do believe a wife to be a glorified servant to cater to all his needs and wants. She is the backbone of the family and the glue that holds it together by juggling whatever roles are necessary, and performing all the tasks she is required to promote, support, and encourage the success of the household.
Why can’t you change a hoe into a housewife?
Even though we are on the dawn of a brand new modern year, there are still men who categorize women into categories, linking their value and respect directly to their sexual experience. According to these men, a wife is not a sexual creature or at least she loses large parts of her sexuality when she becomes a wife. Such a sad double standard. The “wife” is in direct competition with the “hoe” because the premise is that a woman can not possibly embrace her sexuality at the very same time that she is supposed to be caring and nurturing a household. It’s a duality that some women still struggle with. Walking the fine line between being seductive enough, but not overtly sexual because being too sexy gives off the perception that you are not worthy of a meaningful relationship, beyond sex.
We all had a hoe phase
Even the most “pious” of us have had a “hoe stage” at some point in our lives. It might have been fresh out of high school. Maybe during college. Even your first job. You just wanted to enjoy life and live fancy-free and footloose. You weren’t looking for anything too deep and just simply wanted to enjoy yourself. Nothing wrong with that. What about a little later in life when you were more established and you had been in a relationship for a while, and then you split up. You immediately got back out there and started having fun. Living la vida loca trying to compensate for the time you spent in a long-term committed relationship. The details aren’t important. The point is at some point, we’ve all been less concerned with being serious and monogamous and instead were more focused on just enjoying ourselves and getting our rocks off.
Can’t men be hoes too?
They most certainly can be. However, men don’t suffer the same stigma of not being marriageable simply because of an extensive sexual history. Their worth is not directly linked to their sexual experience.
Where do we go from here?
You grow up and you stop placing women in categories or delineating worth to a woman based on the way she dresses or what you believe her sexual history is. People also change. You certainly won’t be the same person with the same priorities at 23 that you will be at 50. At least I certainly hope not.
Stop allowing tired clichés and dusty rap lyrics to be your life’s credo. Kim Kardashian had an entire sex tape and still went on to get married and have 4 children. I don’t think she is a hoe. After all, this was a tape with her boyfriend at the time, but the stench of the sex tape was hard to get out even though she has since gone on to be a serial entrepreneur and quasi humanitarian. I went to college with a woman whose father married his favorite stripper (her mother).
Ultimately, men forge relationships with women that make sense for them and their lifestyle and are happy to overlook something that might be a dealbreaker for others.
What say you? Do people even use the term “hoe” anymore?
