Strategic Dating: Why You need to date with intention
We are so intentional with all aspects of our lives. We carefully craft our careers. We plan for our futures and figure out how to get the most for our money. Most of us know where we want to live and more specifically, how we want to live. Yet, when it comes to our love lives, we rely on happenstance and apply the adage, “if it’s meant to be, it will be”.
If you want to have more success finding compatible partners, you will have to get intentional with your dating. This means that you are thoughtfully deciding what type of relationship you want, and are making the conscious decision to date with that goal in mind.
Define Your Relationship Goals
Before you start dating, it’s important to identify your relationship goals. Ask yourself what kind of relationship you want. Do you want a serious, long-term commitment or are you looking for something more casual? Do you envision marriage and/or kids in your future? What traits are most important to you in a partner?
By having a clear vision of what you want, it will be easier to navigate the dating process. It will help you decide which partners to entertain and how much time and energy to invest in each relationship.
Knowing your relationship goals also helps you recognize when someone may not be the right fit, so you can avoid wasting time all together.
Chose Dates that Align With your Relationship Goals
When you are intentional about dating with the end in mind, one of the best strategies is to choose dates that align with your relationship goals. This means taking into account both the type of person you want to date as well as the types of activities you will do together.
For example, if you are looking for a long-term commitment, then it might be beneficial to avoid casual hookup situations. No NETFLIX & CHILL! Instead, focus on activities that require some level of investment and connection. These activities can help foster deeper relationships and ultimately help you get to know someone better.
If you are not looking for a serious commitment, it may be helpful to focus on low-stakes activities. These are less likely to lead to serious conversations and deeper connections.
Be Honest About Your Intentions
If you’re looking for something serious, like marriage, it’s essential to communicate this early on. You don’t want to waste your time and energy on someone who isn’t interested in that kind of relationship.
The same goes for if you’re just looking for something casual. Don’t lead someone on if you’re not interested in a more serious relationship. Be honest about what you’re looking for and what your expectations are from the onset. This will help avoid any misunderstandings or hurt feelings down the line.
Being honest about your intentions can save you both a lot of misguided time, effort, and energy in the long run.
Keep Your Options Open
When you’re dating with an intention, it can be easy to get tunnel vision and overlook other potential partners. While it’s important to focus on the person you’re with, it’s also important to remember that there are other people out there who could be a better match for you.
Exploring your options allows you to discover what you want and need from a partner. This can prevent you from getting into a relationship with someone who is not right for you. It can also provide clarity on who you should invest your time and energy.
