Are Your Pessimistic Views Keeping You From Finding the One?
So many people are pessimistic when it comes to dating and the options they have. It can be intriguing to get a front-row seat to the various positions that people take in finding the “one”. I receive these comments on my articles. Most recently, I received a pretty disheartening comment.
While the reader’s heart was in the right place, she encouraged me to give up on men altogether. Look for a girlfriend or be comfortable being alone. She then went on to describe how toxic men have been towards women, particularly single women with children. *Sad*
First of all, I like men and there are no amount of bad or disappointing dating experiences or relationships that are going to lead me to decide to “try women out”.
Sometimes things take time
Believe me, I get it. Dating nowadays is not for the faint of heart. I’ve discussed people who have lofty ideas when it comes to finding a mate, and how that can be prevent them from connecting to someone here. But, the opposite is also true. Is your negative and disparaging perspective keeping you from finding a partner that values you?
Mind your limiting beliefs when it comes to relationships
Words are extremely powerful. Your limiting thoughts? Even more powerful. When you walk around with an idea that “good men and women” are hard to find, this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It’s natural to experience pain and hurt at the hands of a failed relationship or a partner that mistreated you. However, if you don’t deal with healing from this, and restoring your faith that the kind of person you want to connect with exists, you will set yourself up for a vicious, self-perpetuating cycle of pain and more bitterness.
We all want love
The desire to connect with others is innate in all of us. Reject the limiting belief that there aren’t any good people out there. Focusing on healing. Work with a professional to help you see that you may have had one experience, or a handful of unfortunate experiences, but that doesn’t define you. Nor does it define your dating trajectory, or what you deserve.
